It’s funny how life works. Visions so strong, realities so real, dreams so close…yet so far away. The burning desires, the have to’s, the need to’s, fighting for time against the want to’s. The wars in our heads constantly asking life changing questions. Questions… ‘should I or shouldn’t I?’ ‘Will I or won’t I?’
I have these wars in my head. I fight against time. I struggle with decisions from time to time. I think we all do. Yet more then fighting these wars in my head, I hold tight to my dream to photograph this world. I’ve worked hard for it, but I have created my own business selling my art through shows throughout the Midwest. I do it because I love it. I love it because I long to inspire people through my art. I won’t let that dream of mine go…ever.
Yet now I have even a bigger dream, because that’s who I am. I never stop dreaming. We need our dreams, we need a vision. More then that I’ve learned we need a purpose. Yet so many things in life get thrown at us…sometimes almost as if we were made to live two lives. The life we live to the life we live in our head. We need to bring that life we live in our head to here. To this exact moment.
In life there will be countless questions you will ask yourself. The more you ask the more you’ll discover. Your dreams will resurface more and more, if they haven’t been hovering around your mind day in and day out already. Throughout your life you might find yourself with wars in your head of what you need to do compared with what you want to do. Yet that’s life. That’s the good stuff. That’s part of your story. That’s where the importance of mindful living and intentional choices step into play. That’s where you can stand and take hold of the reins of your life and direct it in the way you want it to go.
No one who walks this earth lives a life free of nothing tugging at them, holding them down…at least at some point. Yet most people on this earth have choices. It’s the art of making the most of the choices you have made, and continue to make.
No matter the effort, no matter the insecurity, no matter what’s blocking you…your dreams need to come out like a bird trapped in a cage. They need to soar…somehow. Your dreams need to be one of your highest priorities. You won’t figure it out today, or in a year. It takes time and the truth is, even when you feel you’ve got it all figured out, you’ll find you don’t. You change. You change in ways you never in a million years thought you’d change. You change. That’s ok. That’s a good thing. Change doesn’t need to be feared, change can be good. Change can bring out the best in you.
Change made me create this. I didn’t have this idea when I was younger…blogging wasn’t even a thing then. I didn’t even have this idea when I hit 30. Yet I’ve been a writer since I was a little girl. I wrote little stories, making books for my family. I started my first journal at 14. Looking down at the word ‘Diary’ written across the front of the little white book and listening to the little click of the tiny gold pad lock that came with it…it felt so…secret. I don’t think it would have felt that way had it not come with a pad lock and key. ;). Yet at that time, I felt if anyone read that little journal it would be the end of the world. Funny how you think at 14. That was over 20 years ago.
Back then I didn’t have all this…internet and social media opportunities. Now people share their entire lives online, including live births, their souls at the mercy of the public eye. My little white journal is just a pin head of letters slewed across colorful, pastel pages of a 14 year old girl who had not a clue to who she was yet. Not a clue to what life would hold. That was then. Still, years later, here I sit…still writing.
Yet now I write with a bigger purpose. I wrote with a purpose back at 14 too, yet that was for myself. Now I write not only for myself but I write for you too. I say I write for myself because writing is a place I find my heart. In writing I find calm, peace, inspiration, hope and purpose. Yet through my writing that is exactly what I want to bring to you. Writing brings me to another part of my dream and that is to be here, to be real. That is to be here to connect with you. I create a corner of the world that is beautiful, that’s inspirational, that’s purposeful and it is a goal of mine to make you feel more connected to your own life through my writing and art.
I will say, true dreams will lie buried inside you until the end. Until they have an escape. An outlet. Yet there is no one path to get to them. There are many paths. There is no right or wrong, except for not trying. There is no safe route. There is nothing handed down without the sweat and elbow grease put in. True blood, sweat and tears of a burning desire. There will be mistakes, there will be let downs, there will be weakness and there will be bouts of doubt. Yet then, there will be a day when you realize everything that has happened in your life has lead you closer to where you want to be. For now it has lead you to this exact moment. This exact moment of you sitting there reading my every word I’ve written, trying to make sense of it all, maybe one day incorporating some of it into your own life because you were even just the slightest bit inspired.
So with that hope, here I will write. I will write about what I know best. I may not have a solid obvious focus to my blog at all times, but in all honesty, focusing on one thing has never been a strength in me, so that’s simply not going to happen here. I can tell you that upfront. I have a love for many, many things. Yet I will say, I can write what I know most about, and that is just simple everyday life. It’s the magical world of motherhood. It’s chasing dreams. It’s creating. It’s photography. It’s still learning how to live in the now as I am guilty of my mind drifting off to all those ‘I want to do’s’. It’s learning how to simplify, how to be more mindful and intentional with my choices.
I will continue on my journey. I will definitely make more mistakes along the way and make more changes to reach more dreams of mine. I will share my thoughts and not keep them locked away in a little white journal with a tiny, tiny pad lock keeping it in the dark for no one else to see. Because there my thoughts don’t do any good. Here, I know, my words have the potential to reach someone. Even if for a moment, if my words put a smile on someone’s face, help someone or find a place in someone’s heart, I’ve done my job. I’ve reached one of my many, many dreams.
